I think we’d all agree that Phil Hellmuth is a tireless and enthusiastic self-promoter. So you’d think by now he’d be a little bit better at the job. As discovered by Paul Phillips, winner on the World Poker Tour and the patient chronicaler of many bizarre Hellmuthian episodes, this is sadly not the case:

A reader alerts me of the content presently at phil hellmuth’s web site:

"For a second year in a row, Phil Hellmuth makes it to the Tournament of Champions final table."

Talk about your back-to-back performances!

Year One: Ten (invited) players total. Phil surprisingly manages not to go out 11th. ONE FINAL TABLE IN A ROW.
Year Two: Phil fails to qualify for the event. A lifetime of acting like an idiot makes him sufficiently attractive to a sponsor that he is allowed to play anyway at a direct EV cost to everyone else in the tourney. But it’s not enough to acquire $250,000 at the expense of others who qualified fairly. No, let’s brag about it. TWO FINAL TABLES IN A ROW.

You’d also think that after all those columns bemoaning the beats he’s suffered Phil would be a bit more skilled with the keyboard, but, again, nope. Thanks to Paul we all know that Phil is a total JOPKE, and now we know that Phil’s creative spelling doesn’t end there: We’re almost loathe to mention this, because Phil might think it’s a great idea. But Hellmuth really should have a webcam on himself when he plays online. We’d watch the car wreck, wouldn’t we? TWO YEARS IN A ROW [Paul Phillips] JOPKE JOKE JOPKE JOKE [Paul Phillips]