This Fourth of July, Americans will see a lot of American flags scattered all over their streets.

After all, it’s the Fourth of July for crying out loud and it is the Independence Day of the United States of America.

Yup, Americans will see a lot of them American flags alright but how can they tell if these flags are displayed properly? Apparently, there are proper ways to display a goddamn flag and here are some ways how an American can display his USA flag properly.

Yup, even if his USA soccer / football team got unceremoniously screwed at the 2006 FIFA World Cup in Germany. (Ouch, that still hurts…)

When the flag is displayed over the middle of the street, it should be suspended vertically with the union to the north in an east and west street or to the east in a north and south street. Wha?!?

The flag of the United States of America, when it is displayed with another flag against a wall from crossed staffs, should be on the right, the flag’s own right, that means the viewer’s left, and its staff should be in front of the staff of the other flag.

Hey, America doesn’t like it when something’s in front of it anyway. Yeah, things in front of the proud US of A gets NUKED to smithereens…

When the flag is used to cover a casket, it should be so placed that the union is at the head and over the left shoulder. The flag should not be lowered into the grave or allowed to touch the ground.

When the flag is displayed in a manner other than by being flown from a staff, it should be displayed flat, whether indoors or out. When displayed either horizontally or vertically against a wall, the union should be uppermost and to the flag’s own right, that is, to the observer’s left.

When displayed in a window it should be displayed in the same way, that is with the union or blue field to the left of the observer in the street. When festoons or rosettes are desired, bunting of blue, white and red should be used, but never the flag.

Man, there sure are a lot of ways to display the proud American flag properly. Whatever you do, don’t come to a Fourth of July parade with you wearing the American flag like a goddamn thong. Jeez, that kind of stuff will get ya’ killed.

[Celebrate Fourth of July and waive those American flags proud. For those of you who’ll just stay home this Fourth of July, there’s Bodog for some online betting action at home.]