What Kind of Casino Loser Are You?
Gamblers Who Rock at Losing
First off: we are all 50% losers. We know this from listening to emo and playing games of chance at online casinos. It’s just a question of being good at it, at losing. And no, this isn’t like those personality tests at TheSpark.com.
Nor is it about natural born losers. As old news as the concept of direct proportion, the biggest casino losses in history have been made by the biggest bettors themselves: the whales. Mondo extreme high rollers, in gambling parlance. The type who will flip you for everything you’re worth.
So here we are. Legendary casino gambling losses in recent memory. Read and learn.
Kerry Packer, media mogul and arguably Australia’s richest man, was the latest to wear the World’s Greatest Gambler button. He was a fan of baccarat, blackjack, and Vegas, where his luck had been otherworldly. Packer took the MGM Grand for over $20 million in ‘95. Don’t anyone bitch, we hear he liked to share the love – like tipping a Mirage dealer $1 million, and a cocktail waitress with a new house.
In ‘99, Packer proved he could take a hit as much as give it. At Crockford’s in London, he lost a reported $27 million (his camp says this figure is bloated) at blackjack. He took it like a man, sparked political debate back home, and, anyway, many say this whale’s got more money than most casinos. At the time of Packer’s death, on December 27th last year, he left a $5 billion fortune and was ranked as the world’s 94th wealthiest person by Forbes magazine.
Archie Karas aka ‘17 Million Dollar Man’ was a Greek immigrant known for his $26 million run between poker and craps at Binion’s Horseshoe from ‘92 to ‘93. What began with merely a borrowed stake of $10,000 ended with Karas bringing down some 15 poker champs the likes of Chip Reese, Puggy Pearson, Stu Ungar, and Johnny Chan. (Speaking of Ungar, the dude once lost $78,000 within two hours of betting on high-stakes golf.)
Karas’ real name is Anargyros Karabourniotis while his nickname, of course, comes from his biggest documented gambling loss in one sitting. Practically a Las Vegas mythological figure, he gambles to this day, and was last seen at the 2005 World Series of Poker (WSOP), finishing 4th at the 7 Card Razz finals.
William Lee Bergstrom aka ‘Suitcase Man’ came to Vegas straight out of Austin, Texas, to challenge Benny Binion’s claim of booking any first bet, no matter the amount. He took out a suitcase full of $777,000 and placed his bet on the Don’t Pass line at craps. Binion made good his word, and Bergstrom walked away doubly richer.
Suitcase Man turned out to have a bit of a Binion obsession and kept returning to bet a million dollars at craps, and win. On his third time, in 1984, he lost his auspicious million. Bergstrom killed himself at a hotel on the Strip three months later, ‘though it wasn’t because he was bankrupt or anything.
Nick Leeson was a foreign exchange trader who famously lost $100 million of Barings Bank – Singapore’s money, all in a day in ‘95. Having thereafter spent over six years in the slammer, he is now a celebrity host for Celebpoker.com, on account of his “reputation as the world’s biggest gambler with a knack for losing money”.
Finally, this is what you never want to be: a regular punter at the Connoisseur Club in Kensington lost £40,000 at roulette, and came back two hours later to torch the casino. Except he got petrol in his eyes, and basically failed. His name’s Parvis Mashayekhi, and this happened in 2005.
On that note, a happy Chinese New Year to the lot of you high rollers. This is the time to exorcise your gambling demons and be better casino players. As for the rest, just don’t go back out to the real world if you still haven’t heard of smart money management.
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