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Detroit Casinos Morphing Motor City Into Gambling City

By: mullen

The days of Detroit being known as motor city with rappers and thugs (and both) aspiring to be the next Eminem may be replaced with something else — gambling in style.

Detroit is the next casino destination. A decade ago this may have been difficult to believe, but now the thought of Madonna performing a homecoming gig at the MGM Grand Detroit isn’t too far off. Yes kids, Madonna was from Detroit.

And as it is, Michigan’s identity is getting a revamp. For years, four major casinos operate in Detroit — MGM, Motor City casino, Greektown and Windsor Casino across the Detroit River in Ontario.

transformers_optimus_01.jpgMGM is probably the most major of them all, with its Grand Celebrity Room frequented by famous folks the likes of Rasheed Wallace playing high stakes Baccarat.Many Detroit wage earners have also traded their welding equipment to cards and chips taking jobs in the casinos. Bye-bye to oil and grease, baby.

And that’s all about to get better as a new player is about to take a huge bite off the Michigan gambling market. Four Winds Casino Resort, a new…

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No More Virtual Gambling In the Second Life Virtual World

By: mullen

Second Life, that virtual community of, like, 8 million virtual residents who trade virtually and even have sex virtually. Now they’re being deprived of one popular virtual activity, virtual online gambling.

For un-virtually uninterested dude like me, it’s virtual insanity!

Because normal people don’t get off in the virtual world. That’s for people with no life to look forward to. My advice to these guys, go out with real people, get drunk with real people, and for God’s sake have sex with real people!

And what’s Second Life eric cartmanthe next best thing after getting banned from gambling virtually? Go to a real online casino site and play for real. If you don’t want to, well you can always spend those Linden dollars buying stocks at the World Stock Exchange.

Linden Labs, the company responsible for Second Life, has announced as its new ruling the banning of participating in online gambling activities. This comes two months after they made another rule saying it would no longer tolerate “broadly offensive” sexual content in the once free-wheeling world. Punishment for violators is expulsion from ‘The World’. story

Well if they’re gonna act like some cranky-white-right-wing…

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Online Gambling Ban Making You Cranky? Try Proxy Betting

By: mullen

We’re all getting cranky with this UIGEA, and I know that in countries where online casino gambling is banned, the sentiments are the same.

But like Michael Crichton said, “Life will always find a way.” Now I know he meant it to describe how gigantic dinosaurs can spring back to life, which we don’t want to happen, but it can be applied to other stuff as well. Like online gambling.

They may invent every crazy ways of sending online gaming to extinction, but they won’t necessarily cut off its head. Players and industry players will only find better ways to keep Internet casinos alive. So to say it loudly, we keep getting smarter while the enemies keep getting dumber.

Proxy Betting For example, have you heard of proxy betting? Somewhere in the northern tip of the Philippines, Internet gaming companies allow players from all over the world to bet on their favorite games, like black jack and baccarat, via proxies. How? With Web Casinos.

Games and tournaments are video streamed online where players can watch from where they are. At the same time, their “proxies” do the betting for them based on their instructions using a VOIP (voice over Internet protocol).

Make no mistake, web gambling is still banned in the Philippines as well as…

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HORSE shit at 2007 World Series of Poker is on Sunday

By: J.J. Jack

No, they won’t be swallowing horse shit from Curlin.

The HORSE tournament at the 2007 World Series of Poker is this Sunday and it will be the most expensive tournament to enter in the WSOP with a $50,000 price tag.

The HORSE event, with each letter in the acronym standing for the form of poker played in a rather dizzying rotation of games, is expected to draw the toughest professionals in poker and will last a grueling five days.

So why do these sick bastards enter the damn thing considering the steep buy-in and the nasty five-day marathon? Well, in poker, whoever wins the annual HORSE event is considered the best all-around player of the game. Of course, it has more than a few bundles of cash waiting for you too.

Because of the rather expensive entry fee, and of course the relative obscurity of some of the games involved like razz, the HORSE event figures to attract a relatively compact field.

From the uncontrollable chaos we like to…

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Jennifer Tilly is hot for women at the 2007 WSOP

By: J.J. Jack

Jennifer Tilly has big ass tits.

Now that THAT is out of the way, yeah, Jennifer Tilly is rooting for all the women at the 2007 World Series of Poker. The bride of Chucky (although Jen Tilly is not really a bride of a scary doll…) can’t seem to stop talking about women. Heck, we’re beginning to think she’s into this whole lesbian thing or something…

Jennifer Tilly, the Academy Award nominee, not to mention the 2005 World Series of Poker ladies’ champion, has a theatrical take on the subject of women in poker. And yeah, people listen to her. She is after all, a poker tournament champion.

‘’You know how you hardly ever see women serial killers?'’ Jennifer Tilly said. ‘’But when you do see one, she really stands out because of her viciousness.'’

‘’It’s kind of the same in poker. The women who are successful playing in tournaments against the men are so competitive, so intense, so strong, it’s kind of amazing how good some of the best female poker players are.'’

As the 2007 World Series of Poker at the Rio in Las Vegas, Nevada heats up, Jennifer Tilly will be a part of the 2007 version of the Queen of Hearts team together with a dozen female poker professionals, celebs and executives who will donate their winnings in any 2007 WSOP tournament to the…

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Is 2007 World Series of Poker like one full MLB Season?

By: J.J. Jack

The 2007 WSOP tournament stretches for seven weeks while the MLB baseball season has 168 games.

Yep, as the 2007 World Series of Poker tournament heats up before our very eyes, can the full seven-week poker frenzy be compared to the ups and downs of a full 168-game MLB baseball season?

Sure. Only shorter. I guess. And if MLB baseball enables you to deal with the excitement and disappointments of an entire season running in an outdoor park, the 2007 WSOP season only lets you do that to a more confined space like sitting on a chair. The rest is more of the same.

doyle_brunson.jpg‘’The World Series of Poker, over the course of 48 days, is not much different from a sports season that runs eight to 10 months,'’ Jeffrey Pollack, commissioner of the World Series, said shortly before the opening ceremony of the world’s biggest and richest poker tournament, yep, it’s the 2007 World Series of Poker in case you didn’t get that.

‘’We have a beginning, a middle marked by a sort of all-star event and an end that captures the world’s attention. But we do it all in a very compressed time period, and in essentially…'’

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Best tip for 2007 World Series of Poker? Shut up…

By: J.J. Jack

Yep, just shut the fuck up.

As another war heats up right there on the poker table, Phil Gordon still looks like he’s ready to hump a new gay lover. No seriously… Phil Gordon is gay and he’ll still be gay no matter how many WSOP bracelets this fag wins.

Now, in a rather serious note, the 2007 World Series of Poker is finally here. Yep, it’s that time of the year when the top poker players of the world get up from their asses, put on a shirt, and pretend to be a ‘’professional'’ athlete.

Of course, what these guys do phil_gordon.jpgwhen they’re not gambling with a deck of cards is still in question. (Although we all know Phil Gordon likes to hump little boys…)

So, how do you win big poker tournaments like this? What do you have to do to win that WSOP bracelet and slap it on your wrists pretending it’s as valuable as, say… a Super Bowl championship ring?

Well, you can keep your mouth shut. That always works.

Keeping your mouth shut in a poker table always works. Of course, you DO NOT WANT to berate the dealer and call him names like ‘’retard'’ or ‘’when God had to poo, He came up with you.'’ If you get a bad hand, it’s not the dealer’s fault. (Hopefully anyway…) Leave the dealer alone or…

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Roshambo Rock, Paper, Scissors Game Goes Online

By: mullen

I only found out recently that it actually has a name. That rock, paper, and scissors game we play usually to decide who will end up doin’ the lame household chores is called Roshambo.

It’s the alternative for the coin toss.

It’s not rocket science. The rule is rock beats scrissor and scissor beats paper. But paper beats rock.

Roshambo has been a famous subject among geekazoids for years now, In fact there’s Roshambo Programming Competition, a tournament between computer programs that play Rock-Paper-Scissors.

Roshambo online tournamentSo if it’s this popular, then bringing it into the online gambling world isn’t too far-fetched. And yes, it isn’t.

Ultimate Bet poker site has included Roshambo in its long list of online casino games. You can play Roshambo tournaments for real money, or for fun.

Anyway here’s how it goes for some with poor memory, like forgetful Paris Hilton, maybe:

Rock

Beats – Scissors

Loses to – Paper

Reasoning: Drop a rock on a pair of scissors, the scissors will break. A piece of paper, on the other hand, has rock covered.

Scissors

Beats – Paper

Loses to – Rock

Reasoning: With its sharp blades, a pair of scissors can destroy a piece of paper. But drop a…

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Please Observe Proper Poker Table Manners

By: Seth Edward O'Neal

seth-edward-oneal.jpgOf course, everybody can play poker, BUT not everybody can play it right.

Yes, the problem with some poker tables these days is that there is an increasing number of irritating players in it who don’t know squat about the game but keeps on playing it anyway.

What makes it worse is every single time they talk, you’ll find out you’re better off listening to emo all day than hear that screeching belch that annoys you more than a new TV Reality show.

With that said, I will try to teach you some pointers that will help you maintain the sanity poker_tits.jpgin every poker table. Oh yeah, if there’s still that one irritating player who thinks she’s God’s gift to beauty in spite of looking like the missing link to man and ape, please just shoot her in the head with a shotgun.

First off, splashing the pot is a big NO-NO. Most players just chuck their chips at the general direction of the pot. Please don’t do this. Not only does it slow down the game because the dealer STILL has retrieve the chips and count them, but sometimes some of the chips go into the pot and if the dealer doesn’t notice them, not only will it NOT COUNT as your bet but it will be a part of the pot.

Do not stack your chips improperly. Yes, you read it, there’s a proper way to stack your chips. The common mistake with stacking chips is that some players tend to have lower denomination of chips stacked high with the larger denomination of chips hiding behind…

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Puzzled on How to Win at Blackjack? Here’s some Tips

By: Seth Edward O'Neal

seth-edward-oneal.jpgEDITOR’S NOTE: Please welcome Mr. Seth Edward O’Neal, the latest jackass to join our crew. His first assignment? Help ya’ll win at blackjack. Go easy on him mmmkay?

Blackjack is one of the most popular table games in every casino. And yes, with blackjack being as popular as it is today, there are already a number of books telling you what you should do to rule a blackjack table.

But as good as those guys are, blackjack is STILL a game of luck. That means, it won’t matter if you know every single tip in the book. It’s casino gambling, a game of chance, and I surely won’t be one of those people telling you that if you follow my stuff, you’ll be a blackjack champion in every Las Vegas Casino for sure.

blackjack.jpgI can’t do that. But I’ll certainly HELP you become one.

First thing you should do is set yourself a limited bankroll amount that you are prepared to part with in the session that you are playing. Even if you are doing well, discipline yourself not to keep on going, make sure you stop while you are ahead. Everybody knows that.

DO NOT reinvest your winnings back into the game. Not only will it confuse you how much you’ve already won but it will also leave you with nothing once you step out of that casino.

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