Josh Arieh: Turned 31 and We Missed It

READ MORE: Cinnabon, Josh Arieh

Sigh. So, yes, we have rescinded our fangs and are no longer chomping on the meaty neck of our favorite poker player Josh Arieh, but we would be remiss in mentioning that since our silence, we’ve also missed his birthday. Josh has had some very outstanding posts in our absence: his wife took him to a birthday dinner, a heartfelt message to his fans, followed up by an off-the-handle rant that was vintage Bon. Oh, those were the days. However, we did put together a birthday card for him.

Happy Birthday Me!!! Aruba Addition [Josh Arieh]

Josh Arieh: More Cinnabon Revolt

READ MORE: Cinnabon, Josh Arieh

From another cranky reader upset over the death of Cinnabon:

Look here, you faggots, either you continue bashing that asstool Josh Arierusudxj;fs!**@ or I remove your bookmark from my toolbar.

THANKS!
Dan

Our fledgling readership or our dignity? Sigh.

Previously: Josh Arieh: R.I.P Cinnabon [Oddjack]
That’s Mr. Puss Bag to You [Oddjack]

That’s Mr. Puss Bag to You

READ MORE: Cinnabon, Josh Arieh, Reader Mail

Yesterday, we said goodbye to Cinnabon and today we get flamed by an irate reader who apparently liked being hit over the head with the same joke 55 times. Or he really hates Josh Arieh. Tough call:

i can’t believe you’re not going to make fun of Josh
Arieh any more. Is there are reason for this? Did he
threaten to sue you or somthing? He’s a douchbag and
needs to be continually ridiculed as much as possible.

you guy are a bunch of puss bags, if you stop.

For the record, we did not get sued. Thank you for asking, however.

Josh Arieh: R.I.P Cinnabon

READ MORE: Cinnabon, Josh Arieh, Poker Players

Today is a sad day for us at Oddjack as we bid farewell to our merciless heckling of Josh Arieh, aka Cinnabon, forever and ever. No longer will we be scrutinizing his confounding blog, his pastry face and his over-sized ego. We had no mission. We had no reason to pummel him with junior high insults other than the fact that it was fun for us and an annoyance to many. We’ve been told that perhaps this is not the best way to endear ourselves to people. Lesson learned—partially. If you’d like to enjoy Oddjack’s Josh Arieh bashing, well, there are magical web archives and a glorious search menu for you to troll through. We wish Josh well and we will never forget him and we thank him for his patronage. Adieu, Cinnabon.

Previously: Cinnabon Archives

Josh Arieh’s Cinnabon Wikipedia Moment

READ MORE: Cinnabon, Josh Arieh, Poker Players

Because, sometimes, we just like to do things for the sake of doing them.

Josh Arieh [Wikipedia]
Josh Arieh [Josh Arieh]
Previously: Anatomy of an Asshole: The Josh Arieh Compendium [Oddjack]

Josh Arieh: Promises More Cinnabon Tantrums on TV

READ MORE: Cinnabon, Josh Arieh, Poker, WSOP 2005

Josh Arieh has awakened from his pastry-induced slumber and given us a great entry today on his blog about watching himself in the Pot Limit Omaha tournament on the ESPN’s World Series of Poker. He reminisces about last year’s outing by wormy Norman Chad as poker’s new King Twat, questions the generous amount of coverage to Chris Ferguson, and then, in what surely must’ve been a Jesus toast-like epiphany, he considers how he comes off on television:

Anyway…. I have come to realize that being an asshole on TV is much more entertaining. Maybe Phil Hellmuth was on to something when he thought of being a baby…..

Where do I go from here??? I dont know… I’m not sure what to do… people say that its always easiest and more entertaining to just be yourself…. I think that being myself was extremely boring and dull to watch. Maybe next time I will throw a chair or something or trip and fall when coming back from the bathroom….

That sounds like pay-per-view material to us. What would even be better is if he actually ate the chair. That’d be something. But, anyway, welcome back, Josh. Oh, how we missed your soulful musings and backfat charm.

Thoughts of 2005 PLO @ WSOP [Josh Arieh]
Previously: Josh Arieh: Earnestness to the Point of Nausea [Oddjack]

Josh Arieh: Earnestness to the Point of Nausea

READ MORE: Bodog, Cinnabon, Hurricane Katrina, Josh Arieh, Poker

Okay, we get it. Josh Arieh is upset over the tragedy of Hurricane Katrina. He started his poker career in Biloxi. He has friends there. We feel bad. However, this is just a little bit over-the-top and unnecessary coming from anybody:

Check out what my boys at Bodog.com are doing. Guys do me a favor, email them and let them know how cool it would be if I could personally present the check to whatever charity they send it to. Biloxi is where my poker career began and it holds a spot in my heart. Watching the destruction sent chills downd my spine. It would really mean a lot to me to be able to go down there and deliver the check myself.

Eh, means well? Sure. That just seems like it’s something you’re asked to do and you willingly accept as opposed to lobby for. So, don’t e-mail. Bodog knows who Josh is. They’ll ask him to present a check in Biloxi if they need him to. And obviously, he’ll go. But, dude, come on…lay off on the e-mail campaigning.

Bodog To Host Benefit Poker Tournaments for Hurricane Katrina Victims [Josh Arieh]
Bodog Poker Tournament for Hurricane Katrina [Bodog]

Josh Arieh: Tunica Gets a Taste of Cinnabon’s Wrath

READ MORE: Cinnabon, Josh Arieh, Tunica

Amazingly, Josh Arieh has stuck to his commitment to provide live updates from the Tunica tournament and is actually doing a fine job keeping us abreast of how he’s doing. We can only hope that he offers more scintilating exchanges with amateur players such as this. As always the (sic) is universal:

after the break when everyone gets back to the table, the guy immediately to my left asks me “who won that last pot?” Oh man, he had to be joking…. i reply “WHAT?” ,he says “did you win the last pot?”, im steamin now, “Dude, it doesnt take a rocket scientist figure out that I didnt win the pot, I have like 6 chips sitting here and that pot had 20k in it…. you figure it out”… I felt kinda bad for jumpin on the guy, but damn, i had hte second biggest stack at the table before the hand, now my stack is almost the smallest at the table….Oh well

The Bon is on the warpath. Please be advised not to feed the Cinnabon during this tournament, lest we have more unfortunate incidents such as this.

Tunica Day One Summary [Josh Arieh]
Previously: Josh Arieh: Tee Box Rankling Causes Cinnabon Stir [Oddjack]

Not WSOP 2005 - Tunica’s Main Event Kicks Off

READ MORE: Cinnabon, Poker, Tunica, WSOP 2005

After well over a week of watching roadkill-eating yokels knocking out victories in Tunica’s WSOP Circuit Event, poker reporter Jason Kirk must be as thrilled as we are to finally have a few pros showing up to try and take down the Main Event’s $572k top prize.

“The list of players who began reads like a Who’s Who of Poker: Michael “The Grinder” Mizrachi, Tex Barch, Amir Vahedi, John Juanda, John Myung, Chip Jett, Barry Greenstein, Robert Williamson III, Carlos Mortensen, Josh Arieh, Freddy Deeb, Erick Lindgren, Scotty Nguyen, Hoyt Corkins, Eskimo Clark, Eric Cloutier, Erik Seidel, Mark Seif, Mimi Tran, James Van Alstyne, Kathy Liebert, Steve Zolotow, Glyn Banks, and Mike Sica are all here looking to rack up leaderboard points.”

Day one brought the field from 179 down to 71 players looking to make the money (top 18 cash). Our boy Cinnabon is supposedly sitting on an average chipstack, but you know how us guys like to over-estimate the size of our stacks.

Main Event, Day One [Jason Kirk]

Josh Arieh: Tee Box Rankling Causes Cinnabon Stir

READ MORE: Cinnabon, Josh Arieh, Poker

Yes, once again we have another suffered through another long restive from our poker blogging superstar Josh Arieh as he decompresses at home, on the golf course and at the numerous pastry shops in HOTlanta. But he apologizes, so we can almost forgive him. ALMOST. What is patently unforgivable is Mr. Arieh’s use of air quotes when confronted by a crank on the golf course accusing puffy pants of building a lifestyle on illegitimate income:

The guy introduces himself(i dont remember his name, if i did i would expose his ass)… pulls out a club from my bag and acts as if he is adressing a ball. This guy, i guess he was in his mid 40’s says “Soooo, did your illegitimate income buy you these?” SAY WHAT???? I said “excuse me?”, he says “yea, did you buy these with your gambling winnings?” I’m pissed now, this guy really pushed the right button. “Well actually SIR, I play poker, I dont gamble. And if you must know, the answer is yes, everything I have is from my (hand quotations are flying) ‘illegitimate income’”. Man I was steaming.

It’s best to back away from the raging Cinnabon lion when he projects “flying hand quotations”, lest one wants to fall victim to the next level of nettled gesticulation: The dreaded “talk to the hand” maneuver, perfected by Queen Latifah on the TV show Living Single. We’re not expecting Mr. Arieh to go all mobster on the gent, however, a snappier more masculine verbal comeback should surely be in his arsenal the next time a tax-paying citizen wants to verbally jostle him.

Man I Almost Forgot How to Log In!!! [Josh Arieh]
Previously: Josh Arieh: Ego Outsizes Tunica [Oddjack]

Josh Arieh: Ego Outsizes Tunica

READ MORE: Cinnabon, Josh Arieh

Yes, we’re as happy as you are at the fact that Josh Arieh has finally rolled off the couch and decided to pay attention to his blog once again after a seemingly endless hiatus. However, we can’t be too excited since he devotes most of his comeback column to reminiscing about a research paper he did in college about Mississippi gambling. We’re happy he’s at home, being a family man,and still opining about his non-existent golf game, but can’t he at least give us some of that patented Arieh undermining to make us feel worthwhile and whole?:

I had planned on driving up to Tunica next week, for one day of golf and the 10k WSOP Circuit event, but I have heard that the event is not going to be televised. For me, I could care less if its on tv or not, but the amount of players in the field tend to be much shorter when the event isn’t televised. Soooo my plan is to call Saturday to see how many players are already signed up, if there are 100, I will jump in the car and make that 6 hr trip to scenic Tunica. Talk about a town with not a DAMN thing to do. If you don’t want to play poker you are screwed there.

We’ll give that a four out of ten. We’re sure he’s probably right about Tunica being a sleepy town devoid of a Golden Tee machine. But wait—we may have found the real reason for his hesitancy to go to Tunica this weekend. It turns out that the closest Cinnabon establishment is 141.89 miles from where he’ll be staying.

Josh, Where the ——- Have You Been? [Josh Arieh]
Previously: Josh Arieh: Passive-Aggressive Whining About Non-Celebrity Status Continues [Oddjack]

Josh Arieh: Passive Agressive Whining About Non-Celebrity Status Continues

READ MORE: Cinnabon, Josh Arieh, Poker

Josh Arieh is back from his blog break(6 days) and finally finishes the story about his weekend in Hawaii playing poker with models, reality stars, and comedians. Arieh continues to perpetuate his not-so-subtle man crush on Survivor/Amazing Race reality star Boston Rob. And, of course, he lets us know that he just doesn’t like being bothered when he’s on a full-paid vacation to play poker, watch Snoop Dogg, drink and attend his Bodog sponsored parties:

Once again I tried to slip in unnoticed, but the Bodog lady wasn’t gonna let it happen. She introduces me to the media and there was a guy that actually lives down the street from me there in the media…

I’m Almost Too Embarassed to Post [Josh Arieh]
Previously: Josh Arieh: Half-Asses a Shout Out to Us [Oddjack]