Oddjack Cultural Oddsmaker: MTV VMA Awards

READ MORE: Cultural Oddsmaker, VMA Awards

Holla. This week’s Cultural Oddsmaker will pull together odds for this Sunday’s MTV Video Music Awards ceremony. There stands to be much rock star posturing, shout-outs galore, and big ups all around, as the world’s most gigantic musical acts descend upon Miami for the weekend festivities. The event is hosted by Diddy and musical acts include Green Day, Kelly Clarkson, R.Kelly, 50 Cent, and Coldplay. It’s like Woodstock ‘94 all over again. Afer the jump, enjoy enough oddsmaking to kill a man in Reno.

We find it impossible that MTV still has a video music award since we haven’t seen a video on MTV since the world premiere of Madonna’s ‘Justify My Love’. Well, apparently they do. And in addition to giving out a slew of awards to a bunch of people we’ve never heard of, it’s also one of the most highly anticipated awards shows of the year due to the gigantic celebrity turn out. Brace yourselves for the inevitable horrendous displays of hubris.

PROPS ON PROPS

Diddy gives props to Biggie: 1/2

Diddy gives props to Tupac: 1/2

Diddy gives props to Admiral William Stockdale: 45/1

Diddy gives props to Tropical Storm Katrina: 15/2

Kelly Clarkson gives props to Biggie: 34/1

Kelly Clarkson gives props to Justin Guarini: 31/8

Green Day gives props to a Ramone: 16/1

Green Day gives props to Donald Rumsfeld: 100/1

Coldplay gives props to Brad Pitt: 53/1

Shakira gives props via translator: 27/6

ODDS

50 Cent will wear a turtle neck: 100/3

R. Kelly will perform “Trapped in a Closet” while trapped in a cardboard closet: 3/1

The Killers will perform a duet with grammy award winner Michael Penn: 14/5

Miami will be bumpin’: 3/1

Miami will be slammin’: 4/1

Miami will be under water: 1/2

Soundgarden reunites to perform a rendition of ‘Spoonman’ renamed ‘Moonman’ for awards: 69/2

Comedian Jeffrey Ross makes inappropriate Bea Arthur joke at some point during ceremony: 6/1

Camera pans to Bea Arthur sitting in audience wearing a befuddled expression: 17/2

Britney Spears will wear t-shirt showcasing veiny boobs: 5/1

Courtney Love will be some place in studio inexplicably snorting Valtrex: 7/1

FUN WITH THE OVER/UNDER

“What’s up, Miami!” greetings by presenters: 897

“Wasssuuup, Miami!” greetings by Budweiser guys: 0

“Special” performances: 3

“Special” performances featuring Diddy: 5

“Special” performances featuring Buckethead: 1

Previously: Cindy Sheehan’s Last Stand [Oddjack]
Wild on Tara! [Oddjack]